Stress

Are you stressed out right now?  Why or why not?

It often seems as though no matter what I do I’m stressed out in some way.  My life wouldn’t be my life without at least a little bit of stress, and I think that’s true of most people.  I worry about things that I can’t control.  I’m concerned about those I love, those I care for and those I merely help find books at the library.  And yet every day I strive to find that one moment where I’m completely stress free – that moment when I have divorced myself from my worries and concerns and can re-center myself.  Sadly, it doesn’t happen as often as I’d like.

Even when I’m sitting around watching TV, reading a book, or goofing off on the internet, my mind is going a mile a minute.  I’m thinking about the things I need to do at work the next day, the chores that need doing around the house, the special projects yet to be completed, the bills to be paid, the vacations to plan, the exercises I should be doing, the friends I need to call, the (fill in the blank)… you get the idea.  Soaking in a hot bathtub results in the same vicious cycle of thoughts.  It takes an active effort to turn off my brain enough to enjoy a massage most of the time, and enough to sleep some nights.

Sleeping isn’t much of an escape from stress either.  My dreams tend to be the result of something that’s been bothering me for awhile.  Like the other night, I dreamed that I kept finding the day’s cash deposit in weird places and that I couldn’t balance the till.  I know I was only dreaming about it because the deposit for that day didn’t balance quite right with all the new people being trained on the cash register.  The zombie dreams have to do with my need to be prepared and in control.  They all speak to something in my subconscious.

When my stress levels get really bad I start having physical problems as a result.  I’m lethargic.  I’m cranky.  I even have constant nausea, vomiting and other stomach/intestinal ailments.  That’s when I know I need to stop, breathe, reorganize the things that are stressing me, and then tackle them one at a time.

So, the short answer to the original question is: Yes.  I’m almost always stressed.  Some level of stress is normal for me.  I doubt I’d know what to do if I was completely stress free for an extended period of time.  Sad, huh?

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2 Comments

  1. Our second murder in the less than a year on our street somehow is a stressful thing? heh. That being said babe meditate. Have a beer. Hit up the nintendo.

    I dare you to describe what color nothing is! Picture it, you’d be shocked it has a color.

    • The person who murdered him climbed a tree to get onto the second floor balcony, jimmied open the sliding glass door, went into the bedroom, shot him in the head twice and then fled the scene. The victim’s girlfriend (who was sleeping in the bed next to him) was unharmed. Nothing was stolen or even moved. It could be thought of as an assassination. It’s scary.


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