Angels on My Shoulders

To understand where I’m coming from on this post, you’ll have to know a terrible secret about me: I watch Biggest Loser.  Yes, it’s another time to gasp in horror… or point and laugh at me.  I only started watching it last season, during which I discovered that it’s impossible to cry along with the contestants and jog at the same time; I simply didn’t have enough breath to do both!  I can lift weights and cry, though.  It’s difficult and definitely not pretty, but I can do it.

This season there’s a contestant named Arthur who started out as big around as he is tall.  Well, during this week’s episode “The Unknowns” sent a couple boxes of donuts to “The Ranch” team to taunt and tempt them into failing at their weight loss goals.  One of Arthur’s favorite treats is donuts.  He was soooo tempted by those donuts, even after the team took turns stepping on the boxes and squishing them into oblivion.


During his talk with the camera later, Arthur described the struggle he experienced during this temptation as a “fat angel” on one shoulder telling him that he could have just one bite and the “biggest loser angel” on the other shoulder reminding him of how far he’s come.  I immediately thought “No, he means fat devil.” But then I realized that a devil is nothing more than a fallen angel, so his term was technically correct. I also realized that we all have warring angels on our shoulders every day.  Some people call them their conscience, others say it’s the voice in the back of their head, but I can definitely see where the angel analogy fits in with me.

The biggest examples for me are the “Procrastination Angel” and the “Do it Now Angel.”  I think of something that needs doing like exercise, banking, cleaning the house.  Then the Angels duke it out via my brain.  The Procrastination Angel tries its best to convince me that a task can wait for a few more minutes, or until tomorrow, or until I finish this other thing.  The Do It Now Angel tries its best to convince me that doing it now is better.  Sadly, the Procrastination Angel often wins.

Today’s example of these two angels is exercise.  I’d planned on getting up and getting right to it, especially since it’s been awhile since I’ve done anything close to exercise.  The Procrastination Angel said “have your coffee first.”  Then it said “watch Biggest Loser first.”  Then it said “Blog about me first.”  Meanwhile the Do It Now Angel says “If you get it out of the way you won’t have to do it later.”  Then it says “You’re going to run out of time to do it, if you don’t do it now.”  Then it says “Think of how good you’ll feel when it’s done.”  Can you tell which angel is winning?

I just re-read what I wrote, and I totally sound like I have some kind of mental illness.  I assure you, I don’t.  But you get what I’m saying, right?  We all battle temptations every day.  There’s always something else that we’d rather be doing.  Part of being a contributing member of society (or at least not a drain on it) often means doing the things that need doing even though we may not really want to do it.

So, those are the angels on my shoulders today.  What are yours?


Why is it that when you go on a diet, people try to get you to eat unhealthful foods? I’m really frustrated by this!!!

The first week of my eating plan was OK. I only really had one person repeatedly offer me junk food. It’s understandable because he was only 6 years old (my nephew) and doesn’t understand that Auntie is trying to be a healthier person.

Then on 1/10 there was a birthday party. “Have some cake Danie. One bite won’t hurt.” The thing is that I knew if I had one bite, I’d want more, so it was easier to avoid the temptation. Then everyone sat there and made comments about what I ate: “My, you’re eating light today” as they all sat there eating roast turkey dinners covered in gravy. I had a salad with a little dressing and a half a turkey sandwich. It was filling enough and healthy enough to fit in with my eating plan.

During the week it was back to convenience foods. Part of eating healthfully is making sure you know what’s in it. I’m sorry, but just because fast food is easy doesn’t mean it’s healthy. I’m of the mind that even Subway should be a treat and not a necessity. Even though we’re supposed to split the cooking for the week, I feel like I have to do it all because his nights are becoming more and more “convenient” and less and less healthy.

To be fair, he does ask where I can eat, and doesn’t just blindly pick a place.

Then 1/16 was my nephew’s birthday party. We got there late, after the pizza, cake and icecream had been eaten, because my hunny got off work late. My sister became angry with me when I turned down the pizza, cake, and icecream. “But it’s vegetarian!” I know, Sha, but it’s covered in oil. I can’t eat it. So then she turns to her husband and says “Danie says pizza’s unhealthy. Why even bother coming for dinner then?” I wasn’t there for dinner. I was there to celebrate my nephew’s birthday. Somehow she made his birthday celebration about my food intake. I felt so uncomfortable that I left about a half hour after that.

It’s only been a couple weeks, and I’m already ready to avoid social eating situations. The problem is that this is how my friends and I socialize. We don’t really go out to do anything else because their schedules don’t allow it. I either need to make new friends or find a way to guide our outings into more appropriate activities.

Either way, I’m down 7 pounds from my starting weight. I just need to keep going, and keep working towards making healthy decisions.

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